Bored in Gabon. Hanging around waiting to play in the next game of our Africa Cup of Nations fiasco. My team will not qualify – and we never really expected that would happen. Our hotel is not as posh as the hotel that Senegal are staying in – so I visit the Senegal players a lot to watch their huge TV with over 2000 channels. There are lots of TV programmes where men dress up as women. My favourite is Mrs Brown’s Boys – although the other players don’t seem to get it. There are lots of Indian TV shows where the only plot line seems to be that the main female character is really a woman. The players seem to laugh overly at these shows. It’s as if they are re-confirming their own male sexuality.
As tough macho footballers, they are performing a gender role according to how society expects them, as footballer heroes, to perform; and it seems sometimes, to me at least that it must be tough be a straight man and not have the cathartic relief of being able to indulge in episodes of cross-dressing. The players are obsessed with being masculine. Lots of men are obsessed with being male. Look at any gym in every city – they are filled with mirrors! Look how virile you are! Straight men need a constant validation that they are macho enough. You should walk a certain way, talk a certain way, you cannot cry, your tastes and preferences have to be a certain way. If you are not manly, you are judged and ridiculed. Therefore, when they see other men dressed as women, it is a visual self-affirming thrill. So perhaps they laugh too loud.
I have suggested in previous blogs that cross-dressing is a means by which we can get in touch with our whole being. The masculine AND feminine side. The yin and yang of our being.
Perhaps, also, cross-dressing is cathartic. A relief from the pressures of being macho. God knows my football colleagues spend as much time preening and pruning and spraying and squeezing and combing and brushing as their wives. The right after shave or cologne. the right cream for those spots. But if you suggested that they were undertaking female activities they would freak out. And get aggressive.
Dressing up in beautiful clothes, putting on makeup, styling your hair in just the right way – well that’s a beautiful thing to do. It can relieve stress; put you in a more comfortable, psychological frame of mind; make you powerful – and it’s a whole bunch of fun!
Read RED DRESS REVOLUTION! It’s my story. See my reasons for cross-dressing from an early age. How did I cope with being a cross dresser and at the same time being an international footballer in the English Premier League?
And if you buy the book you will be supporting our efforts to make the world more aware of the positive benefits of cross-dressing.
RED DRESS REVOLUTION is published by i-Witness Publications who are a radical ‘daring to be different’ publishing company. Check them out – especially if you’re an author with something radical to say.