I’m Tiko. I’m an international footballer. In Nilemwe, Africa. I have recently returned from playing for a major football club in the Premier League. I’m a cross dresser. I was fired from Melchester City FC club after a local newspaper published photographs of me wearing a red dress and a blonde wig. All this is wonderfully illustrated in my novel RED DRESS REVOLUTION. The ghost-writer Peter has done a perfect job of describing a fascinating example of a clash between cross-dressing and professional football.
I’ve said that Premier League footballers need to consider cross-dressing. Not only will they feel better physically by having the freedom to dress in gorgeous female clothes but it will give them an opportunity to develops their female side. Because the female traits that we all have underpin those creative crowd-pleasing tricks and ruses that can change games and make football so inspiring.
The thing is, dressing up is considered too effeminate, too cissy and most footballers think they would rather be buried six feet under or miss a penalty at Wembley rather than be seen in ‘women’s’ clothes.
Lately my team mates, both at Melchester City and my current team Chanzo Eagles are coming to training in more casual clothes. And some of the ‘casuals’ are decidedly ‘feminine’ especially the open neck shirts and the colourful casual shoes.
At Melchester City’s Training Ground dressing room there seemed to be mirrors everywhere. Reflecting players combing hair and squeezing spots – they’re always too preoccupied smearing expensive lotions into their acne, kneading on face cream for their dry winter complexions and grooming in anti-septic gel for their dandruff. Pruning and preening. Their appearance is vital to them. They live in a vacuum and are extremely self-obsessed and compete with other players to flaunt the most fashionable hair styles. That’s why lots of footballers have outlandish – if not weird – hairstyles. And it’s not just coiffures – clothes too are an obsession. And the trendiest after shave or cologne or underarm deodorant. The conversations they have – these tough macho valiant sportsmen who make a living from their physical prowess talk to their team mates daily about the right chic and the trendiest styles and what aftershave can they marinate in that has enough diffuse aroma to increase levels of pheromone in order to make them more desirable to women. Footballers who have difficulty in understanding ‘zonal marking’ are expert in chemical after shave additives.
Footballers have shed loads of money and can indulge in any fashion or fragrant accessory they wish. So if they have a proclivity for pruning and preening then I should be the last to judge. Because actually – pruning and preening is what I do. A lot. Especially when I dress up, The right hair, the most striking perfume and the dazzling clothes. I talk to my cross-dressing friends down at the Zebra club about these topics all of the time. Like footballers do.
So if this pruning and preening and subservience to style and fashion and looking dazzling is a fixation for footballers – well couldn’t we ask the question how far removed are those ‘weaknesses’ from actually cross dressing? Their inclinations and preferences – their obsession with looking ‘gorgeous’ is something I really understand. If I’m not doing it myself I’m thinking about doing it.
Perhaps the estimated one in eight footballers who cross-dress are more skillful because they are in contact with their female side. It’s a yin and yang thing.